The one where we moved

When we were still dating, we knew that we wanted to move to Canada to raise a family. This is where his family migrated after Hong Kong. And we knew we wanted to move out of Hong Kong in the future. When we got married, we were already expecting Zaki. We had no choice but to process our permanent residence in Canada as soon as possible. Tim had to move back to Canada to be able to process our papers, while Zaki and I had to wait in Hong Kong.

But our wait didn't take long at all. Before we knew it, we were already packing our bags. I was so excited for our little family to be together again. But I didn't realize just how hard it would be to adjust to this new life. So, I did what I always do, I did my best to prepare myself. I did my research. I asked my questions. I did everything I had to do to prepare myself (or so I thought).

I thought that the adjustment they were talking about was mostly the climate and lifestyle. But I didn't know that I would be terribly (exaggerate on "terribly" here) missing the people that used to surround me - my family, my friends, my church. And this new life I've taken on was way more than I could handle. I thought I was ready. But I was so wrong.

It's been almost two years since I've traded city lights for mountain breeze, but I am still in the adjustment phase. The lifestyle, the pace, the people, the climate, oh and the food - I'm having a hard time adjusting to everything! I have no friends - no social life, or whatsoever. I miss my family like crazy. I hate to admit it but I am not doing well here. I am not at my best. And having to raise a family, especially with young children, the move has not been easy at all.

But in time, I know that I will soon be able to adjust. In fact, I need lots of time. And eventually, I will find the right people. I will have friends. I will have a good group of people I can grow with like a young adults group or something. I will be okay, even though, I am not right now.

And in this moment, I have never been closer to God in my entire life. I have clung onto to Him like everyday is my last. And perhaps this move was to move me closer to Him. Perhaps it is something else. But everything that happens cannot happen without God. Everything has a purpose to fulfill. So I will hold on to his nail-pierced hand, and hold tightly, and follow my Jesus wherever He takes me. For now, this is will be my home.